STAR TREK:  THE CROUTON GENERATION

Space, the final frontier.  These are the voyages of the starship
Croutonprize.  Its four-year mission, to explore strange new parts of
Duane Physics, to seek out new Croutons and new Junk Mailees, to boldly
crouton where no one has croutoned before...

USS Croutonprize, NCC(New Crunchy Crouton)-1741-C (for Crouton)

		Starring

Chris Platt		     as Captain Chris Crouton
Karim Farah		     as Commander Highlander
Connie Flieder	             as	Dr. Flieder, Ship's Surgeon
   [  "Damn it, Chris!  I'm a doctor, not a Junk Mailer!"  ]
Lt. Cdr. Eric Moore		Second Officer/ Ops officer
Robert Tarrall		     as Counselor Neon
The Gaz				Ship's Omnipotent Being
Lt. Melissa Midzor		Chief Engineer
The Lights			Asst. Chief Engineers
Lt. Ken "TIB" Stern		Security Chief
Lt. Zortyl Wankoid		Ship's Computer Officer (from planet Yoyoboq)
   [  Wankoid can communicate fluently with every computer in ]
   [  the known Universe except Zen -- the ship's computer.   ]
Lt. Soraya Ghiasi		Chief Science Officer
Lt. JG Jez the Wonder Kitty	Assistant Science Officer
Lt. Ian Frechette		Ship's Philosopher
Lt. Gretzky			Holodeck Hockey Squad Leader
Lt. JG Bockius			Chief Shuttlecraft Pilot
Lt. JG Taubman			Transporter Chief
Lt. JG Himle			Con Officer
Lt. JG M. Turner		Ops Officer
Ens. T. Turner			Ship's Entertainment Officer
Ens. Dave Kindig		The Ice Cream Man
Ens. Rhee Savan			Asst. Engineer/Asst. Computer Officer
The Tulips			Assistant Entertainment Officers
Acting Lt. Neal Chuang		Ship's Prodigy/ Part-time Con Officer
Zen				Ship's Computer
Mordred Lotson			Ship's Bartender (10 Forward Lounge)

		Other characters	

Mad Bob the Avenger		Admiral Avenger, Commander Starfleet
Mark Bradford			Commodore Bradford, in charge of this sector
Chi An Chow			Capt. "Roy" Chow, USS Sandberg
Larry Loesch			Capt. "Boom-Boom" Loesch, USS Comatose,
				  in a constant struggle to wake his crew.
Mike Atkinson			Capt. Atkinson, USS Green Archer, on patrol
				  somewhere in the Mutara sector.
Kris "Lilith" Coulter		Admiral T'Lilith, 1/2 Klingon, 1/2 Vulcan
				  fiance of Admiral Avenger and head of
				  Starfleet Genetics Research Division
Robert Reichert			Commander Reichert, Engineering Instructor 
				  at Star Fleet Academy
Commander Kabeta		Kabeta, Commander of Starbase Harvard
Lt. Nich Shectman		Zenador, Xenologer at Starbase Harvard
Chad Harvey			D'Arc Tangent, Commander of Starbase Syracuse
Lt. Clare "Voyant" Bradley	Security Chief at Starbase Syracuse
Binhan and the Dinochrome	Elite group of Star Fleet Marines operating
  Brigade			  beyond Antares, based at Starbase Cornell.
				  (Reported missing ~Stardate 9002.26)
Kerri Russell			Head of Star Fleet Linguistics Division at
				  Dickinson IV.
Lt. Woj				Postmaster at Dickinson IV.
Vanessa Baker			Chief Bruce on Rice VII.  No transmissions
				  due to its intense magnetosphere.
Errol Flynn			Head of the Star Fleet Anthropology team
				  at Starbase Emory.

		Incidental space beings

The Queue			A disruptive, mischevious being who loves
				  to slow down or stall processes.
Barbara Davis			Romulan spy (no mercy)
Jon Giltner			Romulan spy (no mercy)
Dave				Holder of the secret Top 10 Lists and
				  companion to Romanadvoratrelundar.
The Hidden Valley Ranch Empire	Evil nasty dudes out to kill everybody
The Oyster Crackers		Evil space rogues who attack innocent
				  passers-by for their salads and soups.
Ranche Dresinge			Evil bounty hunter
Dave Mercer			Starfleet stowaway who lurks through the
				  corridors of the Croutonprize at strange
				  hours attempting to solve unsolvable
				  joke physics problems.
"Uncle Marty" Walter		Higher math instructor of many of the
				  Croutons at Star Fleet Academy.
Scott Robertson			Captain of the USS Plasma during Capt.
				  Crouton's tour of duty there.
Johann Sebastian Spock		Crouton Generation's most famous musician.
Bo Jackson			Bo knows *.
The Sneiz Garde			A corrupt corporate empire founded on profits
				  from their superior shield technology.
Pakleds				"We look for things.  Will you make it go?"
Tom Martino			Mischevious Galactic Troubleshooter
Kevin Atkins			Star Con Master of Ceremonies, Bad Humor,
				  and Inedible Pizza
IDIC				Vulcan philosophy of Infinite Delicacy in
				  Infinite Croutons
The Kunz			Multi-dimensional being who, although he
				  can't break the laws of physics, can bend
				  them a bit.
Evi				Evil sorceress and wielder of the B+trees!
Dr. Chuck			The Kunz continuum's junior member.
A.O. Barut			20th Century physicist who discovered uses
				  for group theory in everything from QM
				  to cooking to human reproduction.
The Price			Another member of the Kunz continuum, who
				  is good-hearted, but has the annoying habit
				  of always being right.
A^2 B (A-squared B)		A multi-dimensional being who occasionally
				  shows up to teach the crew about all of the
				  inaccuracies in the Croutonprize's design.
DeGrandiose			A quite mortal particle physicist who THINKS
				  he's an all-powerful multi-dimensional
				  being.  Enemy of the Kunz.
The Carl			Multi-dimensional being who likes to twist
				  the laws of physics COMPLETELY backwards
				  so that problems are "easily" solved.
The Riddler			A very strange being who rules the planet
				  DPG-214 through very odd slave labor.
Professor Love			The very evil right-hand man of the Riddler.
				  If Prof. Love had his way, DPG-214 would
				  end its time as the "Lair of the Riddler"
				  and would become the "Love Shack" forever.

		Nifty Space Gadgets

The Croutonizer			Analagous to the transporter, it breaks
				  your body up until its individual Croutons,
				  breaks them down, and beams them to where
				  you're going, where it re-Croutonizes you.
Warped Drive			Captain Boom-Boom's libido.
Crouton Torpedoes		The more destructive, less-used of the
				  Croutonprize's shipboard weaponry.

		Ships
NCC-1741-C			USS Croutonprize
NCC-1741-C/01			"Fork"
NCC-1741-C/02			"Spoon"
NCC-1741-C/03			"Knife"
NCC-1741-C/04			"Ladle"
NCC-1741-C/05			"Gravy"
NCC-1741-C/06			"Pepto Bismol"
NCC-1741-C/07			"Maalox"
NCC-1741-C/08			"Metamucil"
NCC-1741-C/09			"Spork"

NCC-1823-B			USS Ryne Sandberg
NCC-1823-B/01			"Mark Grace"
NCC-1823-B/02			"Greg Maddux"
NCC-1823-B/03			"Harry Caray"
NCC-1823-B/04			"Steve Stone"
NCC-1823-B/05			"Shawon Dunston"
NCC-1823-B/06			"Mitch Williams"
NCC-1823-B/07			"Andre Dawson"
NCC-1823-B/08			"Mike Bielecki"

NCC-2947			USS Comatose
NCC-2988			USS Green Archer
SS Snagglebarf			Wankoidian star cruiser that Highlander served
				  aboard as part of the Star Fleet Exchange
				  Program
HVR _C Hag_			Commander Bloocheez's ship
HVR _C Shell_			Another Hidden Valley Rancher ship

	Planets and Star Systems

The Hidden Valley Ranch		Home system of the HVR Empire
The Refrigerator		Home system of Ranch Dressinge
Chowder VII			Home planet of the Oyster Crackers