Star Trek: The Crouton Generation
Regular Casting List

Commander Bloocheez		Ed Begley, Jr.
     Commander Bloocheez is the Hidden Valley Ranch nemesis of Captain Crouton.
He stands approximately seven feet tall, with white-blond hair and blue-green
freckles and commands the HVR _C Hag_.

Commander Q. Kumbir		Jose Canseco
     Commander Q. Kumbir is an arrogant, misogynistic, bigoted typical Rancher
who commands the HVR _C Throo_.

Johann Sebastian Spock		Christopher Lee
     The foremost composer of the early 25th Century, his arrogance is rivaled
only by his musical talent.

King of Camelot			Sean Connery
     Elected for a 10 year term, the King is a friendly, yet powerful ruler
of his 23rd Century consitutional monarchy.  He owes much to Jez the Wonder
Kitty, who helped him to repel a Kelvin invasion several months ago.  He
knighted Jez their Black Knight in response and is now seeking Federation
membership for his planet.  (Camelot is in the SMC.)

Admiral Jean-Luc Picard		Patrick Stewart
     The new Star Fleet Commander, since Admiral Avenger has chosen to
take control of Star Fleet Command in the Lesser Magellanic Cloud.  His
competence as a commander was shown both in his long tour aboard the
USS Stargazer and his longer tour aboard the USS Enterprise (NCC-1701-D).
He plans to stay involved with Star Fleet operations as long as he can
before a forced retirement.  His powerful personality often makes up for
his frail, 110 year old frame.

The Kunz			Peter Dale Kunz
     Impish, omnipotent being who, although he can't break the laws of
physics, can bend them a bit.  He is known for his "easy" exams and his
tendency to show up when the crew least needs interruption.  "I think
it'll be an...easy exam."

The Riddler			Brian Ridley
     Peculiar slavedriver of the planet DPG-214.  His peculiar forms of
torture, combined with his peculiar tendency to stutter and sputter and
"Um" a lot, make him an interesting foe.  "Have you...eh...tried trimming
it...uhm...with a few picofarads of capacitance?  Oh, um, yes."

The Carl			Carl Wieman
     The twisted omnipotent being known as the Carl loves to pose our crew
with classical mechanics problems from hell.  His ability to turn nasty
quantum mechanics and E&M problems into "simple" classical mechanics
problems is renowned.  "It's just algebra."

DeGrandiose			Thomas DeGrand
     Insane human particle physicist who believes he is omnipotent.  His
degrandiose schemes often require intervention by the Kunz or other
omnipotent beings to put things right.

Hippie Woman			Beth "Dead Pedestrian" Zecca
     Hippie Woman and her minion Josh show up and rehash old ST:TOS plots
like "The Way to Eden" and "The Final Frontier" by taking control of the
ship and doing weird things.

Prof. Love			William Love
     Twisted fiend and friend of the Riddler who is looking to take over
the Riddler's slaves some day.  He is like the worst qualitites of the Q
and the Hidden Valley Ranchers, rolled in with the Riddler's sadistic
style of torture.

Ambassador Kennedy		Katherine Hepburn
     The noted Earth ambassador from Massachusetts is the latest in a
500 year dynasty of Kennedy's influential in Terran government.  Crossfire
made it into the Academy on her recommendation and the two have a strong
friendship dating back to his pre-Academy days.  Her wit and compassion
plus her strong personality help in her diplomatic relations with other
cultures.

Ambassador Torv			Danny Devito
     Ambassador Torv is another in a long line of argumentative Tellarites
good at disrupting Federation trade conferences, sticking his nose in where
it doesn't belong, and generally making a nuisance of himself.  If it weren't
for the presence of Ambassador Kennedy (his arch-nemesis) at most of these
gatherings, Torv might just sway everything toward the Tellarite point of
view (just so he'll shut up).

		THE GRETZKYS

Lt. JG Janet Jones Gretzky	Janet Jones Gretzky
     Former Olympic gymnast, now serving aboard the _Croutonprize_ with her
husband, Wayne Gretzky.

Joanna Gretzky			(Fictional daughter)
     Wayne and Janet's daughter was born during the height of the Lucky
Charm Invasion at the beginning of Season Two.  Now a year old, she has
been diagnosed with Dove's Syndrome, an incurable birth defect that is
indetectable in utero and is believed to be caused by defective sperm,
caused the father's overexposure to a zero-G environment.  Joanna has
finally begun to develop in the manner of infants half her age, but she
will never fully develop as a human being and will always require a
certain amount of extra care from her family.

MacKenzie, the Notorious Gretzky Kitty
     Meows with one of those obvious Canadian accents and is a big fan of
Bob and Doug MacKenzie of "The Great White North."  He acts like he hates
Jez, but really enjoys it when they beat the tar out of each other.  He is
a mischevious prankster with very little sense of responsibility, except
when it comes to Joanna, who he would protect with his life if it came to it.
He is a big grey tabby, but is still dwarfed by gigantic Jez.